When you're married, you may want to constantly be around your spouse. This can often be the case when you're newly married and have a high level of infatuation about your significant other. However, some partners want more space, and this can lead to some challenges. Namely, if one partner doesn't understand his or her partner's need for space, the former might feel hurt — and this could lead to a rift in the relationship that grows deeper over time. Instead of living with this lack of understanding, consider getting help from a marriage counselor. This counseling professional can talk to you both about the value of space in a relationship. Here are some signs that you might be struggling in this area:
You Don't Like When Your Spouse Doesn't Include You
Whether it's a shopping outing with friends, getting together to watch a sporting event on TV, or some other form of activity, your spouse may occasionally want to do things without you. You might not understand this rationale, but it's important for you to learn that this doesn't mean your spouse doesn't want to be around you. In many cases, it means that he or she values having some space and getting together with others.
You Don't Understand "Solo Time"
In many relationships, spouses can successfully enjoy time by themselves, whether it's going for a walk, running some errands, or even taking a short trip. In other relationships, this behavior can be seen as deeply hurtful, leading to conflicts. The truth is that solo time can be valuable in any relationship; when someone gives to himself or herself, that person can often have a deeper capacity to give to his or her partner. Attending counseling sessions can help you to understand where your partner is coming from when he or she wants solo time.
You're Lonely When Alone
Alone and lonely are two distinct things. If your spouse works a lot or is frequently away from you, you're alone — but this doesn't mean that you need to be lonely. You may be lonely for a number of reasons, including relying too much on your significant other for your own enjoyment. Perhaps you can learn to adopt some fun hobbies that will fill your time. If you notice any of these signs present in your marriage or relationship, seeing a marriage counselor will help both you and your significant other.
Contact a company like The Center for Family Counseling, Inc. for more information and assistance.